I DON'T CARE ABOUT MY "IMAGE"
You want to know why this statement doesn't scare me? You want to know why I could give a rats behind what other people think about me...? Because I OWN my actions. It's called responsibility, honesty and being transparent. I try to live my life the best I can and that means accepting that I mess up, a lot. But I don't try and cover over those mistakes so others think I'm this "perfect little princess". WE ALL HAVE FLAWS. Please don't try and pretend like you don't.
We can't always make ourselves proud, our parents proud, our families proud. We do dumb, silly, things. But we learn from those things. Our parents did dumb silly things when they were young too, and if they try to tell you they didn't just hit them, (don't really hit your parents, they love you duh.) Your parents whether forty or ninety, still make mistakes. My dear precious Grandma still calls me the wrong name all the time and she's the most perfect person I know (sorry grams, I had too).
No one cares how perfect you are if it's a facade, they only get angry that you can't be real with them. Those who love you, love you because they see something special inside of you that is worth cherishing, they love you because of who you are, not because of who you pretend to be.
I wish we could all truly stop caring about our images. I'm not saying go drink yourself stupid and smoke psychedelics with your granny and all your baby nieces and nephews. I'm not giving you permission to curse and push down small children (come on lets be real here). What I am saying is, life is too damn short to constantly be worried about the lens others see you through. If we were all running for office, we may need to watch our actions a little more, but even politicians could learn a little bit from this philosophy. No one REALLY cared about Bill Clinton hanging out with Mary Jane, what they really cared about is that he tried to lie about it.
OWN YOUR ACTIONS. Be proud of your accomplishments and accept that you've screwed up a time or two (or in some cases a billion times.) We need to get over this idea that in order for people to love us we must not talk about our accomplishments and we must shut up about our failures. Chances are, if you did something dumb, someone else did too and talking about it can either build a bridge of healing/growth/closure or it can be an example to others to help them to not make the same mistake. When someone asks you if you did something, don't hesitate, because hiding the truth hurts a lot more than dealing with the consequences.
BE TRANSPARENT. Guilt, from my experiences, is by far the most painful emotion we can feel. When I do something wrong, I immediately feel the need to tell someone about it. It's this weird "purging" type of feeling that if I don't get it up it will just rot me, and it does. The other night I told my mom something that I had kept from her for over ten years. Let's just say it involved fireworks, a broken kitchen bowl and two seriously bored middle-schoolers. Granted it wasn't that big of a deal and we laughed about it, but there was this funny little feeling that crept inside of me that left me feeling free of even a harmless secret.
When we share our pain, our disappointment with those we trust it sets us free and allows them to feel trusted, to feel honored that we would dare confide in them.
You don't have to feel guilty about your actions. If people choose to judge you for them, that's on their shoulders. Once you forgive them for their choice to view you through unloving eyes, you are free from that judgment and you can move on. As long as they continue to think of you that way, they are trapped by their own close-minded philosophy, and the sooner we learn that, the quicker we can forget about them and move on with the rest of our lives.
